Tuesday, July 15, 2014

Mitt Me Again, Mr. Romney

Weird Wally is telling anyone who’ll listen about waking up this morning in a cold sweat.   “I had a dream,” he insists.  “And it was horrible!  Mitt Romney was on all over my television trashing Obama, bad mouthing Hillary and, worse yet, beating her in the polls.

“The last election was bad enough, but another one with Mitt Romney as leading man is enough to make me puke.”  When he first learned of the possibility in a Washington Post article back in April, Wally said that he'd actually cringed.  “There’s something offensive about a top one percenter pretending that tax cuts for the wealthy and less regulation of their corporations, which are people, are good things for me.” 

But Wally also says, it’s getting more and more obvious that Romney will be the Republican candidate in 2016.  And Wally isn’t so sure that Hillary will actually be the leading lady.  “It’s quite possible that she may come to her senses,” Wally is rumored to have said on several occasions.

Besides being in the top one percent herself, Hillary will have to put a lot of distance between her and Obama.  “He’s a good president,” Wally wrote in a Reddit post, “but he didn’t see a lot of shit coming his way, and what little he did, seems to have gotten by him.  And Hillary shouldn't have to deal with it.”

If nothing else, Hillary is a fighter and Wally likes that about her.  Many times, he remembers having sighed in frustration when Obama, once again, caved to the other side.  “What part of ‘No’ don’t you understand, Mr. President?” he'd often ask.

Romney vs. Hillary would be nice enough, with Hillary the most likely winner.  She’s a take no enemies kind of politician, but has a lot of baggage.  But Romney vs. Warren, now that, Wally readily admits, “Is something I could get into.”

And although highly unlikely, if Hillary does come to her senses and decides not to rum, Wally says he is comforted by the fact that Elizabeth Warren is waiting in the wings.   But in Wally’s very weird minds’ eye, he is already affixing a “Clinton/Warren in 2016,” sticker to the bumper of his 94 pickup.  

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