Saturday, June 30, 2007

A math major friend at MIT sent this to Weird Wally two years ago. And, since WW is very unorganized, he just found it again and is finally posting it. He hopes it is not too late for you...

How to Use Math in Your Workplace

What Makes 100%?

What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?

Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?

We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%?

What makes up 100% in life?

If:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

Is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

And...
K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But...
A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

And...
B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

And, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that While Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass kissing that will put you over the top.

And thus are our lives of choice

Stuck at sea and so far from land.

Trust me,
Weird Wally